


"I'm Lactose Intolerant, Boke!"

by Mystorius



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Lactose Intolerant Kageyama Tobio, M/M, Milk, Oblivious Hinata Shouyou, soy milk, tagging is so much work, upset hinata shouyou
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-16
Updated: 2020-09-16
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:40:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 829
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26313565
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mystorius/pseuds/Mystorius
Summary: A month into dating and Hinata starts buying Kageyama's milk for him, but he doesn't realize they might be the same milk cartoon, but one's soy milk and the other is just regular 1% milk.
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio
Kudos: 24





	"I'm Lactose Intolerant, Boke!"

Hinata and Kageyama have been dating for a month now. Every morning, lunch, and afternoon Hinata sees Kageyama buy himself milk. Hinata being the amazing boyfriend he starts buying Kagyeama milk, but Hinata doesn't know Kageyama is lactose intolerant. Hinata also doesn't realize the two cartons of milk might be the same design and look exactly the same, but one says soy milk and the other says 1% milk. Hinata buys the 1% milk.

It first starts with an afternoon practice. Everyone on the team knows Kageyama races Hinata to the club room and then after he's changed he goes to get milk at the vending machine by the gym. But this time Hinata and Kageyama don't race to the club room (Kageyama counts that as one point for him) and Kageyama gets there first. Just as Kageyama is done changing Hinata appears with a milk carton in his hand. Hinata hands the milk to Kageyama and Kageyama just stares at it. The rest of the team comes in and sees Kageyama by the door staring at a carton of milk with Hinata staring back at Hinata with confusion.

After a few minutes, Suga asks, "What's wrong?"

Hinata says, "I don't know. I just bought Bakayama some milk." and Kageyama shoves the milk carton into Hinata's hand and says, "I don't want the milk." 

Everyone is shocked Kageyama not wanting milk is just unquestionable to all of them. Hinata just stares at Kageyama even more confused. 

Kageyama then announces, "I'm going to get my milk."

Everyone just stares at Kageyama walking away. Then everyone stays staring at the door for a few long minutes. Then they all get ready and headed to the gym where Kageyama is there with the exact same milk carton (but little did they know it wasn’t). This went on for two weeks. Every day Kageyama refused the milk. Then one-day Hinata and Yachi both buy milk. Yachi buys soy milk, but she doesn’t know that because both cartons look exactly the same. When they both offer the milk Kageyama takes Yachi’s which offends Hinata personally because his boyfriend won’t accept the milk he gives him, but he’ll accept milk from Yachi which put Hinata in a sad mood all of the practice. This continued for a while. On some rare occasions, Kageyama will accept Hinata’s carton and sometimes he’ll take Yachi’s it was unpredictable. None of them knew why Kageyama didn't take the milk. It was free milk after all. 

A few more weeks go by and a practice match with Seijoh happens. It’s the afternoon and Seijoh is helping set up. Everyone is in the gym except Hinata. Hinata comes in a few minutes late with a carton of milk. Hinata gives it to Kageyama just for Kageyama to return it and then leave to get his milk. Iwaizumi, Oikawa, Kunimi, and Kindahci are all flabbergasted because Kageyama never refused milk. 

Oikawa goes over to Hinata for questions. 

Hinata looks at Oikawa and says, “None of us know why he won’t take the milk when I buy him one, but I have an idea.”

No one questions Hinata, but they are all curious as to what Hinata’s idea is.  
Five minutes later Kageyama comes back and sets his milk down on the bench then leaves again to fill his water bottle up. Hinata goes over to the milk on the bench and picks it up replacing it with his milk carton. He takes Kageyama’s and hides it. Kageyama comes back a few minutes later and sets his water bottle down walking over to his milk.

Kageyama opens the milk carton and takes a sip. Hinata is grinning happily, but suddenly Kageyama spits the milk out on the gym floor. Hinata’s smile slips off his face and Daichi and Coach Ukai start shouting at Kageyama for making a mess and to clean it up.

Kageyama glares at Hinata and starts yelling, “Hinata Boke where’s my milk?”

“Why won’t you just drink the milk I buy you,” Hinata responds with a question. 

Kageyama then proceeds to yell “Boke Hinata boke, I’m lactose intolerant I can’t drink the milk you buy!” 

“You’re lactose intolerant,” Suga asks.

“Of course I am I drink soy milk or almond milk. The cartons in the vending look exactly the same because they’re the same brand but one’s 1% and the other is soy milk and on rare occasions, they have almond milk in the vending machine,” Kageyama responds like it’s the most obvious answer.

There’s just silence. No one knows what to say. None of them knew he was lactose intolerant. Hinata was Kageyama’s boyfriend how did Hinata not know Kageyama was lactose intolerant. Suddenly they hear laughing and then the quiet atmosphere melts away and everyone is laughing either quietly or loudly. 

After a few minutes they all stop laughing and then look at Kageyama. “Welp, I guess you really do learn something new every day,” Yamaguchi says smiling.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm bad at writing but have lots of ideas so bear with me and my awful grammar. Thx. If you want to join my discord filled with quiet people and crackheads here's the link https://discord.gg/qyfcT6S.


End file.
